I am Love

The rain is coming down, at last, and I am finally dressed and showered at 12:30 in the afternoon, after spending half the day sleeping and having a slow morning. Summer this year entails being very active with many projects, friends and a little more time at work with the Saturday Market and the summer hours at the Lopez Island Chamber of Commerce. Friends have been visiting from Seattle, and I am filled with love for those nearby and far away. People life is rich in the Islands with happy tourists on vacation, and the livened energy of all who live here gearing up for the electrical, sparkling energy of summer in the San Juan Islands.

I feel a new freedom. I have a new identity, cleansed and renewed by God. I have always been loved, but now having a personal and daily check in with an all knowing power that is beyond what I can comprehend or fathom, I feel regularly fed and renewed by this Holy Spirit. I am capable of conquering my deepest fears. I know that I am a perfect and loved soul. One of my deepest fears that I have been carrying about, one that the world often tries to validate with its dark sinful nature, is that I am a horrible person, a ‘bad person’ who causes pain and harm to others. That it is ‘my fault’. It is not necessary for me to take responsibility for all the wrong in the world anymore. I just felt like there could be no other explanation when events and things in life went wrong, than that I was faulted or at fault. I am not perfect, I can still make bad choices, but I know now that I am forgiven. I know now that God only see’s what I am becoming. He is that positive and filled with love. He is love. The pronoun does not matter anymore. It is invisible and beyond the point. Everything needs a platform for definition for our simple human minds to comprehend. But we are free and the essence of the meaning of God is so vast and huge that getting caught up on a pronoun is just evidence that you are unwilling to try and let Him in. I am loved, I am not alone, I am fed and renewed daily, and I am seen in the light of all the good things that I am and becoming. My fragile human mind cannot create this love itself, which is why the wounded old parts of me took the blame. There was no blame needed to be placed. That is a worldly condition. Now I am Free, Worthy and Loved. I am Love.