My Subtle Ocean Ripple

All is slow, encumbering, soothing, mellow, tenacious, wicked and blessed. I am here, you’re there. Life exists in a spinning and still sedentary maze full of flowery smells, rigid emotions, and moments passing through like folks in a subway. I love it all, even the difficult moments, yet I am content to be tortured as well as blessed. Life is as it is meant to be and I know this now. There are no mistakes, no lost directions. I follow a stream that leads me where I must go, and God watches the whole way, guiding my every step. Every hardship begets a blessing, and I am still here; stronger, more patient, wiser, and more beautiful with age, gray and leather. No moment is worth discarding and if you look close or blur your eyes to see through the transparencies to the greater meaning, you feel and experience the richness like smooth buttery chocolate swirling and melted as it touches the tongue of perception telling so many secrets that you may not have known if you had never tasted it.

I have had dog troubles. My precious Bruce wanders and most of his life he has been an excellent listener. Now he just wanders a little too far and a little too long. We have resolved the issue by keeping a close eye on him and putting him in the car to take him on supervised walks and runs on the beach. He and Lionel, my other pup, are my children. I feel so much love and satisfaction in caring for them. They enrich my life imminently and I am a better person for living my day on a selfless level that keeps me thinking of their needs and happiness. I see myself as a good mom. I am thankful they are not as demanding as actual children, though I have been known to deeply crave such an experience. I am blessed and see the opportunity for growth and satisfaction in mothering my animal children. It is my truth and what I will graciously accept as my path in this life. I feel so fulfilled by my pups as they bring so much love and reward into my life with their adorable personalities and unending loyalty and admiration of me, a highly imperfect yet blessed and naturally miraculous human being.

So here I am, here I remain, working my simple job, with simple satisfactions in life such as cleaning my house, going for a walk in sacred natural setting, and modestly loving my man of 16 years, blessed by a solid and true relationship that has proved strong as steel, flexible as the feather, powerful and passionate as water, hot like fiery clay, and cool like a northwest summer evening. There are my moments on the deck in the morning and afternoon with a cigarette and a song, dawns spent typing my truths, and warm moments with family and friends sharing conversation, drinks and meals. Life is blessed as am I and I am proud to exist within the glowing web of the great creation we call a planet. I know I am connected with every person I have met and touched as our experience floats out to sea like a ripple or a wave becoming a part of the great ocean, influencing the mass and large events of the world, all connected and all powerful in its subtlety.