October Days
My walk this morning was swift. The sun has been out for two days and we all have been soaking in this Indian summer with wide open hearts and happy skin. The grass all over the property is a rich green and has grown quite a bit over the last couple of weeks. Over the next few days we have the fairly large job of mowing our back yard and the rest of the property where we reside that is nine acres and consists of quite a bit of mowed grass and a few trails. I am contemplating going for a dip in the pond and a hot tub, and I just had a beautiful half-hour sitting naked in the yard meditating and again, soaking up this sun like a tired and thirsty sponge.
My weeks have been filled with dealing with recovering from churned up trauma in my spirit and my body. I spent a week hypo-manic after working a nine hour day at my friend’s wedding helping my husband roast a couple pigs. The recovery took a couple weeks, and I adjusted to yet another up-tick in one of my medications which aided in better sleep, relaxed days and in fighting lingering delusional symptoms from this summer. There has been family drama, and really, I almost can’t equate how much I have been dealing with or how I really have felt. It has simply been challenging.
My therapist has been very helpful, and I am seeing her every week, taking the ferry across the waters of the beautiful Puget Sound to the small town of Anacortes which resides on the mainland. It has felt good to support my mother and my sister through their conflict, yet it also has felt really good to see my parents off to Japan, where they will be traveling for almost three weeks, and welcome the solitude of having this property to ourselves. I love my parents, but they do qualify a large amount of my life, and are constantly around me here on this land. So it is a welcome reprieve to have the quiet here, just Steve and I, our dogs and cats, and my solitary neighbor who has very few visitors.
Today is about cleaning house. It feels amazing to finally take care of chores that I have been neglecting even though I awoke with a headache this morning. This is a perfect example of the weight to the trials that we live with when we deal with mental illness. I can pop a few Ibuprofen to overcome my headache, and then things are fine; because I am dealing with few or mild symptoms today, and I have doctored my exhaustion by giving myself a break from all of my work these last few weeks. Overcoming a simple headache that kept me bed-bound for a little longer this morning was welcome, or really fine. I feel good underneath this simple physical ailment, and after drinking my water and popping the pain meds, I feel fine, and am able to go about my life with a much appreciated ease and confidence.
So as the reggae plays on my computer, and Steve sweeps the floor around our lounging pets, I type away and produce these words for my blog. This has been a quaint check in, I am not sure I really touched on anything profound, and yet writing is still always soothing. I look forward to continuing this productivity over the next few days as the sun is forecasted to stick around and bless us all with its orange, warm and bright presence.