Life is so tenuous. We are here and then we are not. My dog died seven years ago and he taught me that death can be a beautiful thing. He carried me in a dream and showed me what it was like to ascend into the light. I felt pure astonishing joy. When we die we are carried by a loving force, we see all the purity in this magnificent world, scratch that, we feel it. I now believe that in death we are granted one of the only purely joyous experiences we are promised by living. But what about those left behind? This world is full of terror and darkness, and loved ones who are alive and left behind do not live this death experience. They may believe, be familiar with the Holy Spirit and God, but can they trust that those who have deceased are truly in a blessed place? How can we know that if we cannot see, feel or touch their soft bodies and loving spirits? It is hard, while still in our sin filled world to fully trust in this. We are surrounded by so much beauty in this earthly realm, but here also exists endless suffering, devastating stories, and pain, and this is what we are left with. I trust that Rudy is well off; I trust that Corey and Keaton are now at peace in a way that none of us will truly know until we pass to the other side. My dog blessed me with a glimpse of his journey, ascending into a beautiful place, but I could not go with him. Seven years later I still can fall into a bed of tears, because I loved him that deeply. He was at my side through many manic episodes and my last very long psychotic break, shadowing me and protecting me with a loving loyalty that I may never understand as a human being. I trust that I will feel alone the day that Steve leaves me or that he will feel true loneliness if I pass first. But death is imminent. And here, on Earth, where the living preside, suffering is imminent. We must know, however, that after our loved one’s pass, that they are truly at peace. In essence, we are alone in this life, and being faced with this truth is all the more painful because it is and will always be true. We alone have God, but we cannot own or belong to any other human being. Yes, we have community and family, children and lovers, but I have also come to know that we are deeply alone in this life. I am grateful to be able to be close to God in this aloneness, and my heart cries for those who don’t have God because they are essentially in darkness in their aloneness. When we are faced with the death of a loved one we are returned to this place. But we will find strength in this truth, because God is with us whether we know it or not.